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5 months in and finally feel saner!
loopylouz
March 27, 2013 11:39
HiyaJust wanted to post that after 5 months of the most challenging times of my life....finally feeling that things are levelling out and that I''m doing OK!Nothing''s perfect...but is life??? But LO and I are feeling more connected and I feel more affection and bonding towards her...not totally there with the love thing but am feeling OK about that now and not so anxious.Have also realised after 5 months and a million people telling me...that I don''t have to be perfect and it''s ok just to be me....and since I''ve done that I feel more relaxed.Still got lots of issues to deal with mainly around birth family, life story and siblings....but I know i don''t have to deal with these right now...they won''t go away but it''s ok to deal with them later...it''s important for me and my LO to bond and get to spend time together.Guess I just wanted to say to all those out there that felt like I did at the start...I never believed it would improve...but it does and you just have to practise that resilience and patience you told your SW you had!Thanks also to the amazing people on these boards for all their advice and support...it completely helped me through the dark times and I know that I will have other dark times but that you guys are there and understand...which is lovely.Just wanted to share and say thanksLoopy
carali
March 27, 2013 12:17
Good to hear!
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bovary
March 27, 2013 18:22
Yay! Well done you, sounds like you are finding your groove.
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Knight
March 27, 2013 19:44
Hi That's excellent news: well done to both of you
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Shortbread
March 27, 2013 19:49
Thats great, it feels good doesn't it?
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Tabster
March 28, 2013 14:28
Hey Loopy... I think you and I had our respective daughters placed at about the same time and like you I also feel that it has taken the best part of the last 5 months to feel like I'm more in control of the situation! I'm back to work after Easter so that's going to be another hurdle to overcome but feeling more bonded with Chip certainly makes the challenge seem less daunting! I'm sooooo pleased for you and it's great to hear you're feeling altogether more positive! And as regards the support on the boards-I couldn't agree more. So many kind people here have offered such good advice... I only hope I can do the same for others by echoing your comments that it does get easier!! Hugs xx
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jmk
March 28, 2013 14:36
Oh wow Loopy lovely to hear your progress.So good of you to post an update to encourage others to stick with it. I must admit I was very worried about you at the beginning as you sounded so down, so it's lovely to hear how things are balancing out and your and DD are finally gelling.
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loopylouz
March 28, 2013 22:51
Thanks everyone for your nice comments. Really glad for you Tabster that you're also feeling more in control with your LO...great to hear!Yes jmk it was pretty touch and go to start with...but I'm now in a much happier place and I think LO is too.For all those newbie adopters out there, hang in...if I can get through it so can you!
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Serrakunda
April 5, 2013 00:17
good to hear you have turned the corner - can only get better
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phoebe67
April 5, 2013 09:38
Loopy,Well done for getting to this good place!It's great that you are looking forward positively and feeling like yourself again.Enjoy this time,Phoebe xPS Tabster - enjoy the adult conversation back at work! x
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Tabster
April 6, 2013 08:54
Thanx phoebe and loopy for your good wishes... Not sure how I'll cope with the switch to adult conversation or indeed if I've got anything left to talk about except Chip! Always promised myself I wouldn't become a baby bore once my child had been placed but there's just soooo much to share... work colleagues beware!!
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charter
April 28, 2013 23:32
Been following your posts loopylouz as am frequently in 'that' place after adopting my second littly back 4 months ago. I've been too ashamed to post before but just wanted to let you know that I am so glad things have improved. Hope that I can post something similar soon. Thanks so much for yoye honesty and sharing.It truly means a lot knowing that you're not alone. Here's to sunshiny days & many Happy memoriesxxx
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loopylouz
May 1, 2013 14:38
Thanks Charter. Sounds like you may have been struggling too. It is such hard work adopting a child and the emotional upheaval for everyone is immense. I've never done anything so difficult in my life!I hope things improve for you. Hang in there. PM me if you want to chat.Tale careLoopy
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jmk
May 1, 2013 14:58
Charter was wondering where you'd dissappeared to. We're here to help if you need us.
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charter
May 7, 2013 21:22
Thanks guys - I'm just taking a bit of time out at the mo (and in all honesty I feel quite embarrassed to say that I am not managing so well at the moment)...I will be back tho...Loopylouz I may just take you up on the offer of a chat xxx
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