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Managing repetitively saying Mummy

Newmummy June 19, 2019 16:51

Hi all,

My LO has been with us almost 3 months & is doing really well, all things considered.

We spend alot of time playing & interacting as obvs bonding/attachment building - however, if I step out of play/interaction for a moment to make a cuppa or something then repeatedly starts saying 'Mummy' over & over & over! I am finding it tricky to manage - I invite them to be with me, that isn't acceptable they just keep on & on & on. Interestingly doesn't do the same to my partner, who isn't around as much.

Would welcome others advice & practical strategies, that have worked for you - thanks in advance.

Edited 17/02/2021
Sunny11 June 19, 2019 17:40

Hi Newmummy, I remember that feeling, before placement you can't wait to hear those words can you? But the repetition can be very wearing. How old is your little one? My AD did this a lot when she first joined me, and couldn't stand being away from me but refused to come to me. I think control was a big part of the behaviour which was to be expected really as her anxiety was really high with the move. Being playful helped, maybe try peepo games, or use a singsong voice "mummy's here" back to LO, or singing LO's name back to him/her. I used to sing LO's name "Name... where are you? Oh there you are oh there you are how do you do" similarly "Mummy's here mummy's here how do you do" Making it into a game. It will wear off eventually, AD was four years old when she joined me but she still loved the baby songs and peepo.

Edited 17/02/2021
windfalls June 20, 2019 11:13

Hi Newmummy,

My eldest, who isn't adopted. used to do this as a young child. I found that it was a security thing - just needed to know that i was still there. Sometimes i also found that he did it just out of habit. The best way to deal with it is not to make it an issue or get upset/anxious about it. When my son used to do it i would just reply with a "yes?" or "it's ok i am still here". Although it went on for a while it did stop. You need to learn to zone it out. I assume that your LO is your only child and so you will need to learn to zone a lot of things out i am afraid!! I always found that being cooped up in the house always made things more difficult to manage and so I would take my children out and about. I have three children - 2 bs and 1 ad and when all young (in fact i still do now) i was always out and about with them - church play groups, soft play areas, children's farms, - i had membership for lots of places and would make packed lunches, chuck children in the car and out we would go. Even now, i prefer to take children out then stay home!!! Welcome to the wonderful world of being a 24/7 mum!!! - you won't even be able to go the loo on your own any more!!! xx

Edited 17/02/2021

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