I have a 6 year old boy .We've had him for 4 years and his beviour has only been very noticeable over the past 7 months. He is displaying really challenging behaviour, getting into a real rage if he doesnt get his own way or we tell him he can't do something or even when we ask him to do something like getting ready for bed. He hits, kicks, swears, bites, throws things and uses threatening language such as telling us he wishes we were dead and he's going to kill us and can be very rude and disrespectful. Even when he appears to have calm down he will still be angry.He does not display this behaviour outside the house and is beside himself with remorse if he thinks that anyone outside our family will find out what his behaviour can be like including extended family, teachers and other parents He hits and threatens his twin sister, to evoke a response from us as he knows we may put up with being hit but will not tolerate harm to his sister When he gets into these rages it can last for awhile, it is affecting his sister and she's getting very upset at being hit and threatened and feels resentful at the amount of time we're spending with her brother while we're trying to 'manage his behaviour'. This behaviour has been very noticeable to us over the last 7 months. It has all the signs of oppositional defiant disorder
He is a lovely, caring and very intelligent boy and feels shame talking about his meltdowns.
We have contacted post adoption team for help and assessment. They have sent me an asessment form to fill in
The advice needed is how can we 'control' him when he gets in these rages. We get hit, kicked and things thrown at us. We try and give him cuddles to calm him down, even after we think he's calmed down, but this doesn't work. He'll carry on hitting and kicking us and we cant walk away as he will follow us dislpaying the same anger.
