So, I was told that this is a good part to post on and was pointed in this direction of the site. So let me give you some background. I have unfortunately found out I have testicular cancer and unfortunately I am most likely infertile also because I have a mild variocele and no sperm was found when I did samples before my operation. Back in 2009 when I was 17 I looked on my patient records and it says aggressive behavior. I wasn't in the best state of mind then but received counselling. Before this in 2008 I had major bowel surgery and in 2011 I had another operation, and now of course I have had this operation. I don't work and was due to start my second year of university before all of this but have had to be deferred for the year and I have never worked. I would really like to be a parent in a future but will all of this affect me and is it true that I have to even wait 5 years before I am cancer free Thanks
Advice Please
Hiya,
First off I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis and the difficulties you have faced in your past, I wish you well with your cancer treatment and hope you recover as soon as possible.
In regards to your concern as to whether your diagnosis and history will stand in your way when applying to adopt, the best advice I was given is to be totally and absolutely honest with your social worker. Being honest and speaking through everything shows you are open and reflective and offers the social worker the chance to work through any issues with you. The main reason I hear of people being turned down is when their social worker uncovers something that hadn't been openly shared. I'd also suggest calling an adoption agency or your local authority and asking to speak to someone there about your concerns as they may well be able to help put your mind at ease.
My situation was very different but I remember asking similar questions and worrying that I'd never be approved to adopt due to this that and the other. But I was approved, I was matched, and now have a beautiful baby boy.
Good luck with your journey, all the best,
Ruby x
Hi, I am also very sorry about your health issues and wish you all the best.
In the adoption world you are still very young, so time is on your side. Many adopters are in their end 302 to mid 40s. I don't know how an agency would see your health problems. Like Rubymayable said, I would call a few to see what they say.
Two other things came to my mind though. In order to adopt you will have to have a home. You don't need to own it, you can rent, but it needs to be stable and you need a spare bedroom for the child. You will also be expected to take a year off work. So you will need savings.
Another thing they will look at is relationships. Are you in a relationship (you don't need to answer here) and how does your partner feel about adoption? Or if you are single, how are you envisioning your relationship status longterm? All these things need to be thought about and discussed.
I am sure it is all manageable, but it might take time. Time you fortunately have. I would start to read up on adoption or listen to podcasts. There is a wealth of information out there.
Good luck on your journey and I hope you get well soon!
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