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Its quite common to meet birth parents and quite normal to feel nervous. Though meeting them on the first day of intros seems a bit odd - can that be changed, its stressful enough meeting your child for the first time. I met birth dad about a week before.

Remember that they will probably be more nervous than you, they are losing a child.

Have some questions ready - why they chose the name, are their any stories they like to read to them, or songs they sing etc. Get some photos. The SW should facilitate.

It will be difficult and emotional but you won't regret doing it. Good luck

We met a few months after DD came home. We were therefore able to share how she was and photos and videos.

It's really emotional but massively worth it as they will forever be a big part of your life.

We were only given 10 minutes (understandably) but managed to find out lots of little facts that DD loves to hear.

We did this in intros and I think it’s unusual timing. If you can search the archive forum look at things to ask. Maybe think about asking about the name of LO Is it a family name or one they just picked? what do they want you to know about lo?

We had been told we would meet birth parents, firstly before placement then after the AO was granted and I felt quite nervous about it. However when the time came near birth Mum could not manage it. So bear in mind that the birth parents will also be nervous.

I met birth mother towards the end of introduction week, I think it was the day before my son came to live with me.

I had always said throughout approval process that if the birth parent/s wanted to meet I would do it, I recognised how much harder it must be for them than me and if they were prepared to do it, then I would be. But when it came to it, it was at the end of such an intense, emotional, tiring week, I was dreading it and wished I could get on with bringing my son home.

It turned out to be a pretty amazing experience. Birth mother has quite significant mental health problems which meant it was quite carefully planned, we'd both exchanged questions ahead of the meeting. I'd read about all her complex diagnoses and difficulties she'd experienced and on paper in all the reports it was quite alarming. When I met her she was lovely, sweet and smiley. I'm very pleased I will be able to tell my son that. We answered each other's questions and she showed me photos of her family - photos she has since had passed on to us. Half way through the meeting she asked for a break and went out with her support worker. She came back in, and said she thought it was time for the meeting to end, but she wanted to say that she thought that my son's social worker had made a good choice and that she was happy that she'd chosen me to be my son's mum. It makes me cry whenever I think about it or talk about it - to have her blessing was just the most amazing thing. I'm sure this isn't typical and probably very unusual, but I just wanted to give an example - by the time it came along I didn't want to do it, I was so nervous, but I'm so glad that I did. I can tell my son that she is a smiley sweet person and that she gave us her blessing. It also makes sending contact letters much easier.

We were supposed to meet Birth Mum when at the end of the introduction week with the older two (in 2014), but she didn't show up. When we adopted their little brother in 2017, nothing was set up. I remember being nervous waiting for her years ago, but I found it unfortunate that she didn't come. Over the years that feeling has become stronger. I would have loved to meet her. Apart from the 10 minutes talk, you can get so much out of it: body language, mannerisms, voice and speech, just a general feel for someone. It also makes her more alive and you'll have a memory. Good luck!