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We’ve had the following request (below) from Ann Morris, the author of The Adoption Experience, who has been commissioned to write an updated version of the book. Ann is particularly keen to hear from same sex couples who have adopted and from adopters of children with a physical or learning disability. Ann, who is running against a tight deadline, is looking for anything from a couple of paragraphs (just describing a memorable moment, or breakthrough) to about 400 words maximum. You can contact Ann by emailing ---- EMAIL REDACTED ----  What’s your story?Can you help me? Or more precisely can you help all the potential adopters out there who are wondering if adoption is something they not only want to do, but can do.Nearly 20 years ago I was asked by Adoption UK to compile a book about adoption – a book of real stories from real adopters, members of Adoption UK who had shared their experiences with one another in the hope of helping each other up the sometimes greasy pole of parenthood.The Adoption Experience, published in 2000, has shared those experiences with thousands of other adopters, potential adopters and professionals in the UK and in Spain (it was translated and published in Spain in 2004). You may have seen the book, have thumbed through the 100 anecdotes in it, shared the pain of the long adoption process, the joy of first meetings, the challenges of that first year, the elation of milestones met and the loneliness felt when things went wrong.Now the publishers, Jessica Kingsley are interested in publishing a completely new updated book with stories from today’s adopters about the reality of adoption today.Parenthood is probably the greatest adventure in life any of us ever undertake, a rollercoaster of often unexpected experiences – and for adopters the peaks can be higher and the lows lower.The decision to adopt creeps up on people, an embryonic idea which quietly grows, gets discussed as it takes shape until finally the research gets serious. Adoptions come in all shapes and sizes. On adoption websites gap-toothed grins from freshly washed children scream out their “take me” appeal. The agencies are shameless in their sales pitch: Lucy loves Peppa Pig, James makes friends easily, Sam sings along to Frozen. On the surface they need families who will wipe away their tears, tuck them safely into bed, keep them safe and make them laugh and underneath who will do everything they can to heal their broken hearts, put up with the tantrums, the screaming, whatever it is each adoptive child has to deal with that other children never have to face.Adoption with all its joy is something parents-to-be need to be well prepared for, not only by well versed and experienced social workers but also by other adoptive parents who know only too well that theory and practice are two very different things. This is why I need your help.Adoption has changed in the past 20 years: laws have been significantly revised and society has developed different parameters of acceptance.It’s hard to believe how almost impossible it was in the 1990’s for gay couples or single parents to adopt – and if they did get through the system how they were often given the roughest deals, the toughest children. Odd to think that foetal alcohol syndrome was little talked about 15 years ago and that adoption with contact was still rare. How do you face those challenges?Extraordinary to remember how complicated it was for your child to trace his or her birth parents and how the explosion in social media has leapfrogged those carefully set restrictions on tracing making them meaningless. How has that challenged adopters?The aim of the new book – as in the old – is not to underestimate the joys of adoption and we need new stories about that too – but to reveal the challenges honestly as well: to give potential adopters a bird’s eye view of the road ahead, so that they take on a child with their eyes open, mentally if not emotionally armed to deal with whatever comes next.If you have any experience to share – two paragraphs or ten – I would very much like to hear from you. The book will also be using the resources of the Adoption UK magazine. All names and places will be changed to preserve each family’s anonymity.