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Autistic?

pip07 February 21, 2013 21:58
Hello this is my first post although I am an avid reader since my prospective days and have found a lot of lot of support from your posts.I am hoping for a little support now as we are now just over 3 months into the placement of our son. The last weeks have been a true roller coaster of emotions, developing new routines and supporting both our AS and also our BD, who is 5, through their mix of emotions. My husband and I are truly exhausted (!!) but we are coping.Our AS has coped well (we feel) and has strong attachment developing for all of us ­ it has taken longer with his new big sis but is beginning now. The attachment has been our focus ­ we have ''funnelled'' and nurtured and been pleased that he sleeps well, eats well( albeit mostly only chips and chicken nuggets!) and is a gentle quiet boy. An ''easy peasy'' 2 year old compared to our noisy livewire daughter at that age!Now here is the problem ­ he does not talk ­ at all ­ a grunt or high pitch noise but not often. Shows no sign of understanding ­ we have been unable to teach him ''where''s your nose or where''s the blue car'' that type of thing.The health visitor is concerned that he is not talking and is developmentally delayed ­ around 15­17 months on everything apart from motor skills. She has now referred him for further assessment to ‘rule out’ things such as autism, hearing problems etc.We were a little surprised and have now looked into autism etc and have totally spooked ourselves for he seems to have a number of classic autistic traits. He flaps his arms/hands a lot in a very excited way; he licks things ­ fences, doors anything that is new to him; he walks on tiptoes around 60% of the time and a few others things too. We do get very good eye contact though for most of the time.I know we have to wait until he is further assessed and we also know that he is our son forever whatever happens but we can’t help feeling anxious about his future. Sorry to ramble on but I just wondered if any of you have any advice for us at this stage whilst we wait for our appointment to come through.
Edited 17/02/2021
pluto February 21, 2013 22:10
Delay the adoption until you have a diagnosis, you need an adoption allowens if he has autism. Write a daily report about him and all the strange behaviours, you need this when they asses him as they will ask you 1000 questions about his behaviours.
Edited 17/02/2021
pluto February 21, 2013 22:16
My severely autistic child has 'good' eye contact when he wants.If there are specific questions you want to ask pm me and I try to help.
Edited 17/02/2021
FIM February 21, 2013 23:45
there is a spectrum for autism and three seperate parts, so you can have all three parts mildly and not get a diagnosis or one part bery strongly, but not the other two and so not get a diagnosis (You need to be assessed as strongly on two aspects to get a diagnosis in most cases)There are also a number of other conditions that have similar traits and some adopted children 'catch up' once they feel secure = so it could be any number of things at this ageMost professionals I've come across seem to like children to be around 7 before making a diagnosis, so you'd be unlikely to get one before adoption order if you live in our area, so check this out wiht GPhope you get some help
Edited 17/02/2021

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