Archived Forums

Hi Mollymops - I'm a single adopter and was approved for up to 2 children but my wise SW only presented me with individual profiles and I adopted my AD a couple of years ago. I really don't know how singletons take on two in one go. I am also in my 40s and whilst I thought I was fit and healthy, I'm not in my 20s or 30s! The two children you mention are very close in age and I imagine will be very demanding. I think you might want to think about the physical logistics of handling two toddlers - getting out and about, bathing them, spending quality time with each, going through the 'terrible twos and threes' with two. It is physically and mentally exhausting as a single parent and as the children grow and their needs get more complex with school etc, managing this aspect of their lives becomes a job in itself! I suppose that, apart from twins/triplets etc, most children enter a family one at a time. You would be instantly outnumbered! I would urge caution but good luck

I'm a single adopter of siblings (twin girls) they were 4.5 when they came home. I can comment on age being in my twenties myself. However adopting siblings was always what I wanted and definitely the right decision for me.. and them. I would have found the intensity of 1:1 too much. The only thing my girls have in common are their age and shoe size. Pretty much everything else about them is different. For me, because my two get on and play together so well, having two gives me some time. They will happily play whilst I cook meals and can't be there to 'entertain'. Good luck

I'm another single adopter of siblings, although a different scenario as mine were over fives. But one big piece of advice which I'm sure is transferable is not to expect too much of yourself in the early days because the skills you need will grow with time. I famously lost one of my children during intros, just because I hadn't yet developed enough hands and eyes in the back of the head. They come with practice.... after a few weeks I was just losing coats and PE kit like all other outnumbered parents.

A friend of mine who has adopted siblings informed me that although she loves it and would never change her situation. Things to think about are what if one child goes into hospital, who looks after the other one? Practicalities she looked at, she manages though.

Single older adopter with 2 children and soon to adopt a 3rd. You just need to be super organised, accept your children will take all your time and energy and obviously that you won't have much free time ha ha I think however it comes down to your support network, finances and most importantly the children's needs Good luck !

Single adopter with ad siblings, separate ad child and birth child. My support network is very strong and I do use it when I need it! Most of my friends/adopters I know are also single so the same support is given back. It's a busy household but I love it!

I adopted a sibling group of 2 in my early 40's. 2 and 4 at the time (although 4 yo had a developmental age of two) What they don't tell you is how physically hard it is.. picking them up constantly etc.. how my body wasn't used to that and it ached and ached and ached!! (still does 4 years on!) My support network on paper was good... that soon disappeared. My eldest has attachment disorder and the behaviours that came with it were exhausting!. Its been a long road, but i love them very much and they do play together nicely sometimes ( which gives me 5 mins to drink warm coffee for a change!)