Hi all, I’m hoping to connect with some families who are further down the line than we are who also have older bio children with additional needs (or anyone who can offer some advice!).
I am a single prospective adopter with a 9yo son who is currently open to CAMHS due to mild social and communication difficulties which are now largely only present at school. He is undiagnosed but the general consensus since he was around two years old is that he is ASD. It has taken this long to get to where we are now and his assessment with CAMHS has clashed with Stage 1 of the adoption process. I had already paused the adoption process for 22 long months while I waited for CAMHS, gave up waiting... and of course here we are.
I have been honest with the SW about all of the above and no issues have been raised - indeed he will be the same child post diagnosis that he is today - that said however I’m curious as to what to expect down the line. I see his (suspected) ASD and his happy and stable presentation as a positive, it shows how well he copes with his additional needs and how I have successfully parented him and championed him through it etc. It also means I have experience of this and he has insight... but are these positives actually negatives? Ultimately, as his mum I know he will benefit from having an adopted sibling for lots of reasons and together we will cope with the transition, but only I know him in this process and that does concern me.
Would be very grateful to hear of any prior experience of this, but really not looking for advice as to whether we should progress or not. As I say, our LA are supportive of us moving forward and I just wish to prepare as much as I can for evidencing our readiness as a little family.
Thank you x
