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Matching
Heath43
February 17, 2019 18:08
How often have people turned down a potential.match? I've turned down 2 profiles and I feel anxious about turning them down. I wonder if anyone has seen a few profiles before deciding a particular one was a match?
Rosie100
February 17, 2019 23:32
I am not a single adopter, but feel when considering children it is really important that the child feels right for you. We adopted 10 years ago and looked at a lot of profiles but tried to keep a clear picture in our mind of what we felt we could cope with. With adoption there are no certainties anyway; our dd has certainly turned out to be much more challenging than we expected; so I would say if the child has needs you really don't think you could cope with, then do not be afraid to say no. The right child for you will be out there somewhere.
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Bigmrs
February 18, 2019 07:13
I agree - dont feel pressured, this has to be right for you. Good luck! Xx
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Heath43
February 18, 2019 07:22
Thank you for your comments that has made me feel a bit less anxious about waiting for the next profile. I've found turning the profiles down really difficult but I'm really looking forward to what's ahead.
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Serrakunda
February 18, 2019 12:31
Hi single adoter here. If you have just seen profiles and not CPRs it might be helpful not to think about them as potential matches. I looked at dozens of profiles ( 8 years ago - times were different) and actively pursued two, one of whom became my son. I think its a particularly hard part of the whole process. Its hard to say no to a child, but its important that the fit is right for everyone. Good luck - the right one is out there - sometimes it just takes a while to find them
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Heath43
February 18, 2019 22:17
Thank you, the comments really help and it's nice to know others found it difficult but it is a necessary part of the matching process.
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Flosskirk
February 19, 2019 11:06
Hi. I guess it depends why you are turning them down. I have known people turn down match after match because they were looking for something unattainable ie their fantasy child. Have you seen the film 'instant Family'? If not go! It is all about adoption and very funny (And emotional). There is a character in it who wants to adopt a very specific sort of child who ends up changing her criteria.
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Heath43
February 19, 2019 11:23
I'm really not looking for the perfect child and I haven't been overly specific on who id like to be matched with but I've been sent profiles that quite different e.g. different age range. Maybe I should give it more thought though as someone slightly different to what I asked may be the right child for me. I will try and watch that film, I have seen it advertised and thought it looked good. Thank you for commenting x
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