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Hi Lollipops,

Patience is definitely something that you'll need in buckets! I remember when we were getting approved and everything seems to take so long and it's so frustrating. It took us about 14 months from initial inquiry to panel. I don't think ours was particularly slow either, but of course this was some while ago (10 years now) so the process has changed a bit since then.

I found that it all moved really quickly after that because we were matched and our son was placed four months later. During that phase I wished time would slow down so we could prepare for his arrival. My advice is to use the time wisely - do some reading for home study (books on adopton etc.), get childcare experience and do all the organising and decorating in your home you can think of. Now, we haven't painted for a while, it's all looking a bit shabby, really wish we had done more then......

I agree with Bluelizard's suggestions and would add have a holiday before dates get booked for the Prep Group and Home Study. Then when you are approved you need to be available if there are possible matches.

Thanks for your replies. All great advice. We do need to do a few things in the house so I guess this would be a good time to get started. We have a date for the prep group in May so we have a few months to do some DIY and decorating ?

After what we've been through, please don't sit back and wait . Push push push. Go see another authority or agency..it took us 2 years to get approval and now another 2 1/2 years on we still haven't been matched. Like yourselves We are also older and sorry to say this but you will be pushed further away from a match if a younger couple show interest in the same child ...if your authority is anything like ours...we are just a number on a list.

Thanks for that. Yes we are concerned about how long at all takes as we’re not getting any younger! Will try and push them whilst also appearing patient and tolerant!

You are from being too old, I can guarantee. It is important to be self confident and have a positive view about yourselves (while being realistic!). Depending on how good is your SW and how well you work with her/him, 14 months sounds about right. The government is trying to shorten this timeframe but all the SWs are snowed under with work. The regionalisation is meant to be a solution but this will take many years before proving to yield results (if any!).

It took us 3 years as we had to pull out our application for family reasons 2 years ago. We took the time to grieve and then came back again a year and a bit ago, stronger as a couple and with more experience. We decided to go from an agency to our local authority to try a different approach. In the end,we ended up with the same agency after the approval panel due to the regionalisation! But what we made sure of is that we could build a trustful and interpersonal relationship with our SW. It's not plain sailing and you have to be resilient. We are just about to go to matching panel and we know that all these difficulties have made us even more ready for the next challenge. Lots of kids out there waiting for the right home, do not give up.

Thanks. We’ll hang in there and do everything asked of us ? I’m a teacher of children with Complex Needs so I feel I have a lot to offer a child. I have worked with challenging behaviours and have a good understanding of the issues that children can face. Many of my pupils at school are ‘looked after’ children. I just need to be patient and hope that it will all work out right! Next step is the prep group in May x thanks for all the support x

In our experience the first time (2015) took 14 months from inquiring until panel date. This time (2019) with a different agency took 8 months

Thanks. Yes it’s looking like it will be around 14 months at least for us.