Public Forums

Sadly Holly for some of us old guard & in my personal case, single with 2 young sons, that has been exactly what the AUK forum has been all about...

Masses of support from previous posts wise longer in the process adopters & their abilty to share & pm each other offering life survival, living the dream, wrestling with 'issues' how & where to cope.... travelling out of my home due to boys or general tiredness, child care etc was never an option....

Logging in finding friendly folk all offering personal circs & survival tips was truely the only way to stay above the flood water & probs that real life brought.

AUK right now is lost..... swallowed up by a different service with other different fish to fry.... Post placement in my view is what it is all about... rose tint off ....24/7 living with our wonderful challenging children, fighting to get them/us the support they deserve... who else will know & offer survival essentials.... Other Seasoned Adopters Thats Who....

We now are the ones who can no longer give back for all the support we personally have received over the years from wise adopters blazing their own trail dealing with all the issues that we too all too soon encountered.... This forum was it... but no more .... we cannot support & pm anymore... support is gone.....madess

Even now with my still busy but in slightly different 'boy' directions life, going out to meet ups is not really attractive or doable.... relaxed at home logging in to maybe many more wise adopters & their exp & support is much more attractive xx

Sadly no more...

So my view..... Please fix the forum so that it is not broken & unsupportive... Return it to how it was in the good old days.... or at the very least let us 'known' 'historic' ( not pre-historic thanx ? ) 'archiveable posters' x members 'chat' each other & any looking for support & 'lived' advice xx Thats what AUK historically has always offered trusted support from others living it xx

Seems obvious to me tbh support & camerarderie is all we desire xx

Xx moo xx

Ps as a previous long term member there was never any support groups near enough to me.... or populated by those only early in the process & family finding so then unable to offer the support my boys needed...

I absolutely and whole heartedly second that - well put Moo - I thinks it’s what so many of us have been trying to say since April / May! I did go to a group a couple of times and also to a couple of courses but it’s not practical for a lot of people (wasn’t really for me either but I managed a couple) and didn’t really meet my needs - I’ve also filled in the survey but there is nowhere in that that really addresses the option put by Moo

I also agree with Moo - living in a rural area, support groups were never close enough to be useful....

I'd love to be able to support the next generation, but AUK is not allowing that on these new boards.

Hi Moo, Safia and Bop,

Thank you so much for your feedback. I have added your above comments into the survey results so that they are included in the review process.

With very best wishes,

Holly

Bump...

Views on AUK

Please give us some hope...

Xx moo xx

Hi Holly

Thank you for this and to everyone at Adoption UK for revitalising the peer to peer community groups. We go to two in our area. Both run by Adoption UK members: a community group in Warwick and a Friday night Chill n’ Chat in Coventry (the Coventry one really should be called “Cake n’ Chat”, our host loves baking!)

I think there’s so much potential with the Adoption UK community groups. Not only fantastic as peer to peer support, but also as they represent a huge amount of untapped local adoption knowledge, experience and expertise that needs releasing into the wider local adoption community and maybe beyond.

One area that I thought the Adoption UK community groups could make a big difference/impact on is to support adoptive families with their local schools. Now that children have returned to school, the discussion, topics and themes at our local peer to peer groups are dominated by school issues. It’s so desperately sad to see adoptive families plunged into crisis by their children’s schools.

I wondered if the Adoption UK community groups could share their knowledge of local schools to create a simple directory of “adoption friendly” schools. They are out there! Both our children’s primary and secondary school are “trauma & attachment aware” and I would recommend both schools to all adoptive parents in our area.

A very simple local adoption friendly school directory/guide would be really helpful to parents, especially parents who have adopted older school aged children and have to hit the ground running. Obviously, it would need some initial thought and oversight. Understandably, some adoptive parents are very bitter when it comes to schools (i.e. they have had such poor support/experiences). I wouldn’t wish the directory to become an opportunity to vent personal frustration against a certain school. In fact, keep it simple; just highlight the adoption friendly schools. For example, such and such parents recommend this school. Have a chat with this teacher in the school for more details etc.

Who knows where it might lead? If the directory works, there may come a time when Adoption UK are able to introduce a nationwide scheme to accredit schools as being certified as adoption friendly by local parents.

I am sure you will all agree that as adoptive parents there are so many very simple things we could all do in our local Adoption UK Community Groups to better support each other. I have some ideas in the community groups to support older children, but that’s for another time……

Thanks again Holly and team. Keep up the magnificent work. We really do appreciate all your hard work.

Take care

Simon