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Adopted Son of six years wants to return to Foster Care

May 14, 2019 13:56

Our adopted 11 year old son wants to return to Foster Care as he feels he would have a happier life!

Now I'm not saying that this is related to the fact that he is currently under punishment for stealing money from his parents and grandmother but..............

Anyway quick history, we adopted a sibling group of three, just over six years ago. Naturally trials and tribulations followed and ups and downs a plenty.

Since he started secondary school his behaviour has deteriorated and he's having an influence on his youngest sister, which is in turn causing further issues. Senco, at his school, are involved and have been pretty good to date and he has now started seeing a psychologist through the school.

We tried PAS but haven't heard from them in over a year.

Just wondering if anyone has had any similar experience and can relate to this.

Edited 17/02/2021
Serrakunda27 May 15, 2019 13:25

Hi - sounds like PAS need a kick up the pants !

My son is nearly 15, we had a big bust up over Easter, he had all but packed his bags ( not sure where he thought he was going !) I don;t think its uncommon for any child to threaten to leave him after a fall out, and unlike non adopted children, adopted children may perceive they have 'alternative options'. Given what you say about his behavior generally though there is unlikely to be underlying issues,

I would consider theraputic life story work. We had a lot of problems around this age, though fortuntately he was always OK at school. We had life story work - it was a very difficult thing to go through but enabled him to thrash out a lot of issues and come to terms with a lot of 'stuff'. It was tough but we are in a happier place because of it.

Edited 17/02/2021
Bop May 15, 2019 20:17

Be really careful...

Our AD wanted the same after six years (again eldest of sibling group of three, though she was older) and eventually she did - but it was horrendous- she wanted to take her siblings with her so make allegations. Sadly I can't go into details on here and can't chat as I'm not verified.

I'm glad school are supportive, but I would recommend trying to get PAS involved again too. Also keep a diary of significant stuff.

((hugs))

Edited 17/02/2021

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