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Larsti reporting in from hols in Yorkshire Little Dash has been a 'handful' but we've has some good days. Today he had his photo taken with Peso and Captain Barnacles at a Sea Life Centre.Love to all....be back in harness soon! Have a Lovely time hamLoveLarsti x

Please forgive me for I have sinned it has been eight weeks since I visited the f thread confessional. Have a no. Of excuses extremely fucund (if that is the right word) daughter, a would begangster son and Mr h is having a mid life crisis wants a motor bike and a fast and loose bird (I know what you are . Up to Mrs buff). God are those donkeys still alive and someone please put me out of my misery what's the old bird invented now solar power whisker removal system.

Mistress Homerton we forgive you for missing m, n and o. You Must be having a mid life crisis too and who can blame the f ers when that happens.Now how I can be calm. well past my bedtime and can't sleep but hope you are in the land of nod Teletubbies.oh dear larsti hope the good times outweighed the bad with Dash.enjoy the rest of your hols.quivering in the hope I have corrected the alphabet for the OCD contingent but who knows with my state of mind

Now I'm ever so confused about where we f ers have got to. If we hurry we can sort it all out before the OCDs get online. Thanks Ham I slept the night away whilst you were busy posting.Malta- where I went in my previous lifeNorfolk- where I've never beenOslo- where AD would like to goPortsmouth- where AD did a crab over the glass floor of the spinica tower when she used to leave the house & her PJsQuiet - wot it is round here when they shut me out of their lives & hermit in their stinky rooms

Right then...who are the OCD contingent? Hope you are not Referring to me!! Right lovely to see Homerton back on here...you are forgiven but you do need to attend confessional a bit more regularly....we missed you!Reference library....I used to work in one. That's my confession...so I do lurve the alphabet! Where would we have been without it in the days before Google.

so ....I can't keep hanging about waiting for B to come around again.., we haven't had the funeral yet...but as we know..inventions do not wait for any man (or woman)..and as Mr Puff has submitted the patents for the invention I need to crack on with the advertising...time is money in this business..ok...here it is..(and if 100's of you say you already invented this I will know its a lie because otherwise it would be in morritescasrose shops)its not the same as those imitation cardboard frozen ones either...I like a burger...homemade..big and thick and juicybut what I DO NOT like is all the gloopy wondrus stuff/additions (ketchup,mayo, onions etc, etc).. slopping out the bun...very annoying and messy.I also like french bread...fresh crusty outside and soft inside...so...when making your own burgers..instead of doing the 'round thing'...you do the rectal thing''' a lovely, straight edged, thick pattie in a perfect rectangle shape with fits into your french bread a treat!!!..you cut the french bread leaving an attached spine so that you can catch all the wondrus gloop in the bread.its just as easy forming a rectangle as it is a round...they cook the same...its going to marketed as..'Puff's rectal burger'which I think has a catchy, all inclusive feel to it...don't you? anyway..this is already in the bag..so onwards and upward in the shed...am seriously considering homertons solar powered whisker removal system...except the sun's gone in today and I have whiskers.....what to do?Larsti? you took your harnesses to Yorkshire?...all your leather 'stuff' on holiday with you?leave it alone girl would you...just for once...for the families sake...at least...Ham....hope you have gone to Turkey..ham and turkey?....= PIE....diet not going well at ALL...xxx

Tut... Tut.... Suffolk Puff. You do NOT mean "rectal". You mean "RECTANGULAR".So that your home-made burger fits the RECTANGULAR shape of your french bread.Honestly...... wot AM I going to do with you????xxx

There are two long threads going on, neither of which I have read until I strayed onto the end of this one....Rectal burgers????? Dare I read further back

U must stay with us homebird the only requirement is knowledge of the alphabet.admittedly there are some run birds on here, larsti talks to stuffed donkeys,Ham is challenged in other ways nd 'll punch is quite frankly needing a steam cleaned mind as some of the things she comes up with are revolting. By the way you have to put pencils up your nose if you intend to stAy and visit my igloo.failing that I'd make a run for it if I was you.

VERY difficult at the moment,this thread is....xx

woo hoo!we have a new member....welcome homebird We must have a BBQ so we can try these new burgersWe have met quite a lot of animals on holiday, but no donkeys, stuffed or otherwise Well, over and out from meWill be back in harness when we get back SP...ie back to what passes for work

Xtraordinary to see your post, Larsti.Xtremely strange to see posts by Suffolk Puff about "Rectal Burgers".Xpecting to hear from everyone when they are back from their hols.X-hoping that I can take a rest from the letter X as it's driving me mad....... xx

You know what Madrid...you are the refreshing voice of sanity on this thread! Soon be A again. Perhaps for novelty value we can have a sensible round..Yeah right

Zzz being boring logging on while away.Zept I need some adult company 3 solid days of dd driving me demented.Zo went swimming with dolphins today was brilliant.but Thistle sulking as he could not come.zitting by the pool in Malta so way of with Turkey SP.Zo what presents do you want.Ham

A list of presentsAw how sweet amhA return ticket to Malta for two please for DH and me And childcare while we are away of course

Bristow Pottery please ham...perhaps one of their Volcanic Tables...able to withstand extremes of all typesand NO Madrid...I do NOT mean rectangular burger..not at all..the patent office forms only have so many spaces to name your invention and rectangular would not fit the boxes...what is wrong with rectal burger...????its catchy enough aint it? sales are a bit down I have to say...perhaps people are getting fed up with BBQ's, I might have to spice up the rectal burger to make it more appealing for the 'autumn market'.any hints or suggestions for spices and herbs to make my rectal burgers go with a bang?

Chives

Do I have the honour of being the last poster on the f thread in its present incarnation????Dill

Endives

Fennel