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Grandson # 5

aprilshowers July 28, 2017 14:54
oh yes my kids are on a roll, number five is due November and is another boy....much to the disappointment of his mum. Middly has cleaned up her act, she is off the drugs, SS are keeping an eye, her mental health worker is keeping an eye and so is the health visitor, her other son is only just a year old, sometimes she does not cope, but we are on hand, I worry and worry and worry, and I am jealous, one baby pregnancy would have been enough for me, a friend said recently that when she gets to heaven she will be having a word with god about the distribution of fertility.
Edited 17/02/2021
Wizzywoo July 28, 2017 16:35
Oh congratulations april and you are right there sometimes seems to be little justice in life at all ! My adopted childs mother is pregnant ( yet again) and with more than one baby to boot ! She is unlikely to be allowed to keep them! On the other hand I also know of a few couples who are desperate to concieve just the once ! Doesnt seem fair at all. But you have done a great job and are still there supporting your brood so take huge comfort in that . Well done to middly on her amazing progress and hope the new grandson brings you much joy ! X
Edited 17/02/2021
lilyofthevalley July 29, 2017 00:01
oh aprilshowers, I do empathise. I liked your friend's comment very much. It is so true. Being an adoptive grandparent can be very different from being a birth grandparent, of course depending on circumstances. In my extended family education was valued. Children were brought up well by stable, loving parents. Adults were in regular employment. Families were able to provide a good standard of living for their children. Adults were responsible and law abiding. A new baby was an exciting event, grandparents would be very proud. The baby would have a good life. This scenario would apply just as well for a child who has been adopted, providing that there are not enormous difficulties to be overcome. But if your adopted child is beset with problems, such as suffering from ADHD and FASD, Dyslexia and Dyspraxia and PTSD from being abused and neglected when living with birth parents, and abused again in foster care - then the future is not so rosy. This child will struggle to become independent, to be law abiding, to get a good education and employment, to be self sufficient, responsible and mature. Then, if at too early an age there is a pregnancy the future for that new child becomes worrying. With support they may manage and they may mature. A lot depends upon the partner. Is the partner an asset, providing stability and good judgement? Or is the partner equally vulnerable or, worst case scenario, does the partner have even worse problems than your grown up adopted child? For an adoptive parent in this situation news of a baby being expected brings not joy but anxiety and worry about the future. I know. I've lived and continue to live this scenario. At least Middly has supports. I so hope that things go well for you all. It is so important that she does not get pregnant again as the problems mount up, the more children there are. Thinking of you. Lily x
Edited 17/02/2021
Serrakunda July 29, 2017 00:11
I won't offer Cliff Richard's C word, but as Lily says, I hope things go well take care x
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Johanna July 29, 2017 23:57
Thinking of you and your hubby. It has taken a lot of hands on grandparenting here too but the four from the next generation still remain with our two girls. Next generation aged seven, four, nearly two and an early summer arrival. Sounds as if Middly is accepting support and hope all works out well. Johanna x
Edited 17/02/2021
Madrid August 1, 2017 09:05
Aprilshowers I agree with you. All I ever wanted was to have one baby. Xx
Edited 17/02/2021

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