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Our children accessing their files at 18: what barriers have they faced?

TrillK October 27, 2019 10:58

Hi all, I've been involved in a thread on twitter in which several adult adoptees have been adamant that my son will not be able to access his records once he is 18 without passing some level of proving himself ready.

I am aware that there was a change in the 80s which means that people adopted before 1975 have a difference level of access and have to attend a session, sometimes called counselling which they find offensive, before they get them.

I am also aware that GDPR laws allow an exemption on the grounds of adoption, namely because some birth parents were told that they would NOT be searched for after giving up their child, and it seems some SW / agencies apply redactions very inconsistently with some adoptees getting very little info at all, less than we AP get in the CPR for instance.

But, and it got very acrimonious at this stage, they still insist that my son will have to meet a SW first and "He can be denied them in the grounds that he is not fit mentally to receive the information".

However none of them can explain to me why this is, legally speaking, and I've had to abandon asking as they've taken it as me refusing to believe them about the redacting.

So my question is for any AP whose children have reached 18 and asked for their files, what barriers did you face and how did you overcome them?

My son is only 9 but I'm getting my head round this now!

Gov site on accessing records isn't much help: https://www.gov.uk/adoption-records

This goes through the pre and post 1975 difference: https://t.co/slFWKBAfRZ?amp=1

GDPR and adoption exemptions: https://ico.org.uk/for-organisations/guide-to-data-protection/guide-to-the-general-data-protection-regulation-gdpr/exemptions/

thanks

Katherine

Edited 17/02/2021
Serrakunda27 October 27, 2019 14:24

can I gently suggest that you really don't worry about this right now? Its another 9 years before your son can ask for his files. He may not not want to. Legislation may have changed by then. He may find his birth family on social media.

There are any number of things that could happen between now and then. I'm not sure why you are getting involved in such an acrimonius debate at this time. Honestly, I would leave it alone until much nearer the time.

But, for what its worth, I was advised by my current social worker that my son will need to meet with a social worker before he accesses the files. She currently does this work with young adult adoptees and in most cases its just a chat and the files are handed over.

I don't know the legal position with regard to files not being handed over. However can I suggest that you also reflect on why it might not be advisable for files to be handed over without councilling,

These files can contain a lot of very difficult information. The teen years can be very difficult. I know a number of very fragile late teen adoptees who might struggle with the information their files contain.

I am anticipating that there will be particular piece of information in my son's file that I absolutely would not want him to receive 'cold' as it were. He will need a lot of preparation to deal with it. And thats just one piece of information that I know about.

Edited 17/02/2021
Safia October 27, 2019 17:13

I agree with Serrakunda - I see it as a support for the young person not a barrier. Mine haven’t been the least bit interested - but both have learning difficulties so would definitely need support to help them go through them. My daughter is doing life story work and was really thrown by a piece of information she found out which was actually in the papers we had - so not even something new that was revealed in the files - but was significantly different from how she understood it before - and is still something she has not examined properly with her therapist

I also agree that it is a long way away - lots may happen - it’s not a given your son will want this information - and there may be many things in his life that make it more complex

Edited 17/02/2021
TrillK October 29, 2019 12:28

Firstly I disagree that being prepared is a bad thing. Our children will face enough barriers as it is, without us ignoring ones we have been told exist in time to prepare for.

Secondly, I'm asking for people who have been through this experience to share what they have found to be the case.

AP may view the rules as being about offering support, but that is not the lived experience of these adoptees. It is being cited as reasons for why they were told they cannot access their files. This isn't about GDPR redaction of private third party information, this is about wholescale denial on the grounds they are mentally unfit. But there is nothing about who determines whether they are fit or how they come to that conclusion. Nor can I find anything about how the adoptee then proves that they have become mentally fit enough to access the information. That's not counselling, that's restricting.

If AP have children who have been through this recently then AP whose children are about to go through this need to know what to expect. I may have 9 years but others do not, and yet I could not find anything on these forums on this topic.

Edited 17/02/2021
Serrakunda27 October 29, 2019 17:37

Nobody said being prepared is a bad thing, It just seems a little unusual to be so exercised about something that is at least 9 years in the future when a lot could change between now and then, let alone whether your son will actually want to access his file and if so, if he would be considered not fit to receive the information.

My son in nearly 16, so a lot nearer in time in this. We have asked social services for support in another matter related to information about the birth family and been refused until his 18, Its frustrating but to be honest we have so many other considerations at the moment that its not worth fighting the SWs on this one,

Edited 17/02/2021
Milly October 29, 2019 18:58

Sorry I cant answer your exact question but I do think you are worrying about something which you don't need to think about for years and may never actually be an issue. My eldest wanted to get in touch with bm when she turned 18. She contacted our local post adoption service but was a bit confused by what they said on the phone. I suggested she requested a face to face meeting but before this could be arranged she decided to contact bm on social media. Since then she has developed relationships with various bf members.

We have a file with lots of information in - court records etc (which I don't think we should have been given!). She's not interested in reading them - she only consulted them to check out some dates of birth. She doesn't want to talk about the past with her bf either. She knows why she came into care and has done for as long as she can remember. All she's interested in is knowing them (and the initial enthusiasm has definitely worn off). I really can't imagine her poring over files or asking searching questions. Maybe when she is a lot older possibly, though now there's no mystery anymore (she was adopted as a baby), I very much doubt it.

Everyone is different, of course. Younger dd would probably be a lot more interested in all the fine details. But on the other hand, she's always been much less focused on who her birth family are, than on how being adopted makes her feel.

Why pursue this now when you don't know what your child will be like at 18?

Edited 17/02/2021
Zora October 30, 2019 06:43

I think people are trying to say that since the rules around things change all the time, whatever research you do now may simply not be applicable in a few years time. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be prepared but you may have to continuously check that rules have not changed in the meantime.

I have not heard of people having problems accessing their files.

Do you know any of the people personally who said they were refused access? It is easy to claim all sorts of things online. They may have misunderstood, they may have received heavily redacted info which to them jeans no access, but in fact is different. They actually be in such a had place that yes it is not in their interest to receive this information. But in that case the authorities would have had to go through an assessment and they would have been found to have no capacity to make a decision on this. It is simply not the case that social workers just refuse.

Edited 17/02/2021
Donatella October 30, 2019 10:23

https://www.gov.uk/adoption-records

These seem to be the facts.

Having said that, my son is 18 and has shown zero interest in accessing his files. Too busy with living life. Personally I think 18 is too young anyway - especially given the discrepancy between emotional and chronological age.

My other two are also teens. Middly has never shown any interest though we did basic lifestory work when he was younger.

DD has been curious so we went through a package of lifestory work with her recently. For now - she’s 14 - she knows all she wants/needs to know.

I guess all kids are different - mine have no explicit memories of their birth families and right now are too busy living life in the here and now to be too concerned with their pasts.

Edited 17/02/2021
chestnuttree October 30, 2019 11:47

I don't see this as a purely personal issue. If there are barriers to adoptees accessing their files, than that is a political and legal issue. Although I can see why there is a compulsory counselling session, I am not sure how useful a one-off session is by a sw who does not know the adoptee and potentially with an adoptee who is refusing to engage in this session.

I understand why some adoptees see this as a infringement on their rights. There are no compulsory counselling sessions for non-adoptees to access any of their files - files which could also contain traumatic information. I am certain these sessions are well-intended and very helpful to some, but they are forced onto people who are legally adults.

On a personal note, I am certain my daughters will want to access their files, even though we have heaps of information already.

Edited 17/02/2021
TrillK October 30, 2019 12:32

For the benefit of anyone reading this thread to find out more, I have established the legislation that talks about with holding of information:

http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2002/38/part/1/chapter/3/crossheading/disclosure-of-information-in-relation-to-a-persons-adoption

I think the clause they are referencing is 61 (5) (a) " In deciding whether it is appropriate to proceed with the application or disclose the information, the agency must consider— (a) the welfare of the adopted person,"

In the same piece, the section 63 on offering counselling with regards to accessing records is only termed as "may require" not will. I am trying to find out more about why that is.

There is nothing I've found yet on how an agency decides what determines detrimental to welfare, nor how an adoptee can then improve their situation enough to be allowed the material.

I only found out about this due to following adult adoptees on Twitter. My son is incrediblyinterested in his history and so I started this thread in the hope of finding out if the situation still continues today. Obviously law as written and law as applied varies greatly across agencies and time. But you can't know if a new or changed law impacts on something you've not researched in the first place.

Thanks for reading this

Edited 17/02/2021
BeckyAUK October 31, 2019 12:56

Thanks TrillK for posting your findings on this. I saw the exchange on Twitter and was similarly surprised and confused, so it's good to have it at least somewhat cleared up. Speaking personally it seems rather paternalistic that agencies could choose to withhold information about an adoptee's own life and history from the adoptee themselves if they have chosen to ask for it and they are a legal adult. I know as parents we may have concerns about the emotional readiness of our adult children to handle the information, but for the state to withhold it seems a different matter imho. The welfare of the adopted person is, of course, relevant, especially as some information may be extremely distressing, but personally I'd feel as though that would influence what/how much support was offered when disclosing the information, not be a reason to withhold information altogether.

Edited 17/02/2021

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