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What to do?

Rosie August 16, 2019 20:42

We’ve just been in touch with our local council permanency team and they have said they can come and do an initial home visit but there isn’t a study group till Feb 2020 as the Oct 2019 group is fully booked. They have said it might be quicker to go through a different agency such as an adoption charity if we don’t want to wait till Feb 2020 for the study group. I’m not sure what to do. I’m 42 and hubby is 47. We’ve just got married a few weeks ago and had our first contact with social work a year ago. They recommended waiting till after the wedding as the adoption process can be stressful and they didn’t recommend doing it while planning a wedding! I’ve heard that the council are really good at supporting adoptive parents through the process and afterwards...so do we go elsewhere or just be patient and wait till 2020 to get started? Any thoughts welcome! I don’t know anything about other adoption charities and we had just assumed we would go through our local authority.

Edited 17/02/2021
Bop August 16, 2019 21:37

We waited over a year for our initial prep group....Feb 2020 isn't that far away....

One thing the process will teach you is patience...there will be lots of delays and waits for various reasons. Use this time wisely to learn about the issues you may face such as attachment, trauma, FASD, ADHD, ASD etc, get experience with kids, get your finances, health and house as sorted as they can be and enjoy doing fun stuff together that will be much harder once you are parents.

Edited 17/02/2021
aquilegia August 16, 2019 21:55

Hi, you're probably itching to get started! I felt the same as well before starting the process. Bop has given some great advice. Keep a log of any preparation work/ reading you do so it can be included in your prospective adopter report. Prior to approval myself and my husband went to some adopter support groups run by adoption uk. It was a really valuable experience for us.

There is nothing to stop you looking at neighbouring local authority's to see if you can start the process sooner. However if your LA has a good reputation for post adoption support then that is a real plus point.

Is your user name related to where you live? If so you should consider changing this as it may be identifying.

Good luck, let us know how you get on. ?

Edited 17/02/2021
moo August 16, 2019 22:18

I had a years wait for my la to run the prep course....

Contact your local primary school in a few weeks to volunteer as a reader/listener for reception/ pre school.... You will need to demonstrate to ss that you have recent experience working & interacting with children.... school will need to do a DBS on you If you are already doing it before prep course real brownie points...

Other ideas volunteer with brownies/cubs/youth club/sunday school....

Check out on here recommended reading lists.... I had the chance of going with a smaller assessing agency a few months earlier but decided to wait.... original agency had a bigger sw team for assessments & children waiting....

Check out monkey & Mcmoos post about panel... it will give you an idea about timeframes...

Take the time to research & be very ready... ahead of the game...

Biggest tip.... any forms that arrive that need you signing... drive them over in person..... as soon as received back at ss the clock starts ticking! The week in the post to stamping makes all the difference.... I got to panel 6 weeks quicker! As others took 2-3 weeks to get their papers back? ? ...

Happy Reading....

Join AUK the advice pre prep will prove invaluable ?

Good Luck...

Xx moo xx

Edited 17/02/2021
Jingle bells August 16, 2019 22:54

St. Andrews children society, check them out, John Street Edinburgh.

Edited 17/02/2021
Rosie August 16, 2019 23:30

Thanks everyone. I’m actually a teacher for children age 5-18 with additional support needs so have a lot of experience with children already. My husband has less experience so after reading your posts I’m thinking it would be good to get him a bit more involved in the lives of his cousins young children so he can get some practise in relating to children. I don’t know why my username is coming up as that! I’ll try and change it!

going to try and lose some weight before February too so I’m able to run around after children and so my BMI is healthy x

Edited 17/02/2021
Rosie August 16, 2019 23:32

My username is Rosie1977. Does anyone know why it’s saying Edinburgh Council as my username ?

Edited 17/02/2021
moo August 16, 2019 23:44

Umm no...

See if you can report it to mods... if already a member 'chat' mods to change it xx

Mystery xx

Do y'a think dh would look good with a woggle? Maybe a scouts volunteer.... ? ss like volunteering in a 'formal' setting too ? iykwim !

Good Luck xx

Xx moo xx

Edited 17/02/2021
Rosie August 16, 2019 23:46

Thanks! Yes I’ll see if we can get him a bit more involved. His cousin lives close by and they have a four year old daughter so might see if we can get some babysitting!

Will see what he thinks about the scouts! ?

Edited 17/02/2021

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