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I have not experienced childhood abuse, but I have an unusual ('complex' in sw talk) background. I had 1 or 2 solo sessions with our sw. It was no problem at all. In contrast, at approval panel someone commented on how well I had coped. So don't be disheartened. They just want to make sure you have processed it all and it won't come back to haunt you and your child.

Thank you so much for responding. I guess I was just worried about my past being seen as a barrier to adoption. So good to hear from you that it all went smoothly. I was so disheartened after our meeting yesterday when she said they needed to discuss it in more detail in an individual session. Hopefully they won’t view it as too much of a negative. I’ve had 6 years of private psychotherapy so it’s not like I’ve not explored it in depth. ?

I am guessing that your social worker just wants to go over it to be totally clear on anything that upsets you, if brought up. They have to be fully able to answer these questions for you at panel so I think by them coming to your house can hopefully only be a good thing. Being totally thorough is a good thing. Good luck xx

Thanks ? hope so. I’m just being completely open about my childhood and answering anything that comes up. Can’t do anything else but be completely open and honest x keeping everything crossed!

Exactly, sounds like you are doing eveything you can. Open and honest is the best way to be. x

? thanks

I can’t comment on the situation but I just wanted to say that there are so many positive points to come out of what you are saying. You are being completely honest which is a must and SW’s appreciate that. You are upfront which really does count. It’s not an easy subject to discuss I can imagine but the fact you have been honest means you take the process seriously. You have sought professional help which means in difficult situations you are able to and feel comfortable in asking for help. You can empathise with a child. The children who get adopted will have almost definitely experienced some form or trauma/abuse. It’s daunting I know but there are many positives. Focus on those. Hope this helps

Oh and most importantly it shows resilience

Thank you so much. I really needed to hear that. I was so upset when they said they needed to discuss it further but I’m feeling so much calmer now. I need to show them that I’ve addressed the abuse. I work with vulnerable children in my job as a teacher at a school for children with Additional Needs...so I’ve experienced children who show inappropriate sexualised behaviours etc and I’m not triggered by it anymore...14 years in a special school has been the best training for me as it has helped me to address these things...going that will help to support my case that I can be a good adoptive parent ?

And even that is another positive factor. The positives just keep on coming. I wish you all the luck in the world. Be strong in the positives and make sure your SW sees them too

Thanks x I’m so glad I found this forum. You guys are all truly amazing. Thanks so much for your support ?