Edited 17/02/2021
How much violence is ''normal'' between sibs?
Autumn Jade
April 4, 2013 23:31
Without my own bcs and just going on friends'' with no acs stories of inter sibling violence, what would you say is a ''healthy'' (!) amount? I mean, I know I can expect a two yr old to hit out, say if a toy is taken, but is that ok for a five yr old? I''d say our eldest (5yo) dd is emotionally 2-3 yo, so I don''t know if I''m making a particular fuss over it because I know their background was very violent or if its standard sibling stuff. They generally don''t bruise each other (with the odd exception) and its always in the heat of the moment, mostly competing for toys or my attention (a ''no I wanted to tell mum'', then thump! type scenario). I''m fairly confident our approach to dealing with it is appropriate, I just really want to gauge how affected by early experiences their current behaviour is, hope that all makes sense!!Thanks for reading, all thoughts welcome x
REM
April 5, 2013 21:35
I wonder that too!My two are adopted and they do fight, but, like you say, no bruises, no blood (except for a couple of accidents).My mum, who brought up five birth children, says that my two aren't u.usually aggressive, and are about the same as my nieces, who are the same ages and have as stable and calm a family life as you could want.I think the important thing is that you feel confident in your approach. Firstly, it will take time for you to have an effect. What you're doing now may well lead to calmer behaviour as time goes on. Secondly, a parent's instinct is worth a lot. I get the impression from your post (forgive me, if I'm misunderstanding) that you're not really worried about this, that you suspect it is within the normal range. You are probably right. You obviously pay attention and reflect on your children's. behaviour. I thinkyou would feel worried if something was wrong.
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Pear Tree
April 6, 2013 10:04
I think for a guide on things that are normal range you can just look at mumsnetBut for a slant on the adoption things, I'd look to thishttp://nysccc.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/stablechild1.pdf
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pingu123
April 9, 2013 23:12
Pear TreeI did try to link to the stablechild1 pdf file but the URL seems to land me on a demo blog sample pagePingu.
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Autumn Jade
April 18, 2013 00:47
Hiya, thanks for replies :-) Rem, yes, you hit the nail on the head! It's not so much a big concern as a nagging curiosity! From what you've said I think we're fine but just wanted someone to tell me that :-)Hi Peartree, thanks for that, have now 'joined' mums net but haven't had chance to have a good dig around on there yet. I too tried the link but no luck, may work whe on pc not phone! Thanks again :-)
Edited 17/02/2021
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