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Do have a read through the schools board. I have bumped up a thread which you may find useful.Ofsted reports are fine as far as they go but often the best schools are not the right school for a child with a traumatic past.Ask about inclusion policies, behaviour management, are they used to working with challenging children, with LAC. What would they do for a child who struggles with unstructured times such as break times? What catchment area do they cover? If school is used only to educating nice, middle class children then they may struggle with a child who acts out. Far better that they're used to a diverse range of children. Finding the right school is so, so important. Go to the school, ask to meet the head and the senco. Have a look round. Do they make you feel welcome? What are the office staff like - may sound silly but they're often a good indicator of the schools ethos.

My son came home when he was going into primary two, and had just turned six. He has found school very difficult, this isn't everyone's experience, but more common than not i believe. If i was doing it all again, I'd want to know the answer to these questions:Do they have nurture groups? Do the staff have experience of looked after children and adopted children? Have the staff completed attachment training? Do they understand developmental trauma? What discipline systems do they use? Traffic light etc. How would they modify this if necessary? How is unstructured play time supervised and managed? What is the child teacher ratio? Do they have support teachers for children who may need support but don't have a statement?My questions are based on the issues my son has had. You may find different ways of getting the answers! My son isn't classed as having additional support needs, but was very behind. School is also very scarey for him. Ideally i would have chosen a smaller school with less children, but We live in a busy town. My sons school told me they had lots of experience of similar kids, nonsense! The Head Teacher had previously worked in a very deprived area, so considered herself to be an expert. I've had to fight to get his needs supported. My son is in the minority in terms of kids with challenging backgrounds or homelives, so the teachers aren't experienced in understanding or even recognising his difficulties.I'd suggest that You narrow your search down if You feel You need to, but base your decision on the needs of your future child. Even a child who does well academically Will have some kind of emotional, attachment issues, and likely sensory issues as a result of their experiences. i visited the school during the matching phase when I'd heard more about DS and had spoken to his old school.I Hope I don't sound negative, i just now know What i would have focussed on when meeting the head teacher. Even just picking up whether they listen or not. Good luck.

HiThank you for your replies, i have read through the Schools and Education thread and found it very useful.Have now got a list of 20 odd questions to ask...beware schools LOL!Thank you!!Daddy & Dad

I'd also ask if they have other LGBT families. Not so much that I would not choose the school if no, but I'd be interested in their reaction to the question.School need to be able to support you through day to day stuff like other kids asking your kid why they don't have a mummy or if that's your dad then who is that other man. Or what will the kids be told to do when it's the day when they make Mothers Day cards ? I'd be fine with lots of options - make a card for your dads for instance or asking if they have a grandma and suggesting making a card for her - but loads of ways this can be handled badly eg telling child they cannot make a card or must make a card for birth mum.

Hi DucksI was thinking of asking about the schools experiences with other LGBT parents but was unsure, but think i will ask it now as never thought about for example the "mothers day" card scenario.Plus i guess it would be nice to know that if the other kids in the play ground are asking about why you have two dads how the teachers would help support our children.Thanks for your advice.Already been told by one school that they have minimal experience of a LAC and they dont think they would be able to meet their needs!!Onwards and upwards i think!!RegardsDaddy and Dad

From the same sex parents angle - we avoided church schools...We also went for a school with large classes rather than small (but with a very cosy, safe vibe!) because our kids are different in lots of ways and in a bigger class there are lots of kids who are differnt in lots of other ways so they don't stand out so much. Also more chance of finding proper friends if there is a bigger range to choose from.Also...read their mission statement - suprisingly revealing for some schools! The staement for the one I finally chose just made me cry it was so lovely...and this was backed up by everything I have found since. I guess this won't always be the case but worth a look.Sounds like you're not matched yet?I would hold off actually visiting schools until you have met your children. Then when you visit you willl get a better sense of whether it is the right place for them. Also you can meet with the head and see if they want your children! You can make it more personal and you will have a better idea of what specific things might be hard for them. Of the different ones I visited 2 of the heads were amazing - clearly interested in kids with extra stuff going on and really WANTED our children! So lovely. The choice in the end was blatently obvious though. Good luck!