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Hi EllarooWelcome and congratulations on your placement! I had the same issue a few months ago: couldn't resist the temptation of looking at BM Facebook's page and saw a pic of my LO sleeping in her arms during a contact. I was terrorised as it was a recent pic so I have asked the same questions: unfortunately there is nothing it can be done as the child was not placed, let alone adopted yet, and the pic was her property so she could do whatever she wanted with it. Strange enough I received the very same photo, in an enlarged version, for my LO memory box. For us the chances of someone bumping into that pic are slim as we are in two very distant cities, but it was unsettling anyway so I can totally understand how you feel!I guess the best way is to put the thought of it aside, keeping your fingers crossed and hoping for the best Sorry I cannot be of much help, but I have read your post and did not want to run.Good luck AM

Ooh I am so glad you have asked this because this is exactly what I have seen. We aren't happy at all because DS is instantly recognisable too. We are not that far away from each other either. I wish I hadn't looked but curiosity got the better of me! I know I don't have an answer to this, but I just wanted you to know you aren't alone with this.Facebook!!!

hi we got the same here, so we approched Lo social worker and asked her to tell BP to take off as photo LO was taken when LO had a placement order. Any photos taken when placing authority has parental responsibillity must be taken down. I think it help that we asked BP to take it down as we didnt want alot of people find out they were adopted, as LO could be identified and bully them, but they were taken down. Also told BP we couldnt give them photos as they were being put on facebook. so could have been us or the social worker.

wiltflower that's interesting, I thought that it was only once a child has been placed that you can ask for photos to be taken down, (ie it being the misuse of photos sent via letterbox or other contact with BF). I didn't realise that it also applies to photos taken by birth family members when a child is in care. That is useful for adopters to know.

We had the same situation, sw asked for the photos from final contact to be taken down and because of this we where advised not to send photos with letterbox.

Thanks for all your replies. I will speak to SW and ask if photo can be taken down.

I think you have to be careful if you are looking at birth family facebook page - they could see that you are looking. Be careful.

I was told that sw 's regularly check birth parents Facebook sites nowadays because this is becoming such a problem.

You have had some good advice re Facebook photographs taken since Placement Order and I would push hard for SS to deal with this.As for photos taken prior to Placement Order, I am unimpressed with the notion that these are the property of the birth family to do with as they wish. They may be their property, but this should not entitle them to publish them if this could embarrass, threaten or harm your child in any way imo. I think as adopters we are so used to jumping through hoops, taking advice, etc. that we can end up a bit supine and accepting of the totally unacceptable. I would consider leaning hard on SS to intervene in your child's interests as regards requiring the birth family to take the photos down, and take legal advice or approach your M.P. if they are unhelpful. I really think there needs to be a change in the law as regards the privacy of adopted children on Facebook, hence my idea of involving your M.P.As far as the birth family's feelings about you looking at their Facebook page, if it is public then you have a perfect right to do so, along with the rest of the world! Their problem if they don't like it: they could always use private settings which would be more appropriate anyway. With the horror stories abounding of young teenagers being harassed by birth families on Facebook, the time to set firm boundaries is now while they are still little imo.

I think the issue of looking is that then your name/picture could be suggested to them as a possible friend. If they know your name they could well put two and two together.I have heard of people creating dummy facebook accounts to be able to look at people's pages when they didn't want to be found themselves.

Yes, I have rifled through BF FB accounts as myself and then went to a training course and was told about various apps which can trace who's viewing.BD's accounts riddled with photos, from the past, and status updates about them all being together again ...one day.I would definitely set up a fake account which is plausable. Possibly make it look like a company selling something or change profiles so they don't twig that one random person is viewing them all the time.

Facebook uses a random formula based on lots of things for it's 'people you may know/suggest friends' feature. I can't be 100% sure, however I very, very much doubt FB even stores information about profiles you view as part of this complex formula. It would be too risky - there are lots of apps on facebook which claim to tell you who has viewed your profile. These are all fake, if there WAS something within the formula that stored that info then some spammer/hacker would've exploited it by now. Even if facebook DOES store info on profiles viewed, you would need to have some other connection (by mutual friends, location, work, interests, email lists exported etc - it IS in the 6 degrees of separation sphere!) to appear on their 'people you may know' list.

Just to add and hopefully help allay peoples concerns....these 'apps' - are spam! They CANNOT tell you who's viewed your profile...its a marketing ploy to ascertain YOUR interests/likes/friends/pages etc when you download it to try and view who's spied on you....common misconception but disappointing trainers etc haven't researched properly!I'm confident in my answer as I work in the industry and have first-hand knowledge of this particular type of software..Hope this helps ally concerns out there if you've been looking at BF pages !!

Hi Ellaroo,We've had issues with this. Our LO's photo is on his BM's profile picture. (Sorry not up to speed on Facebook terminology!) His SW consulted the legal team and we were told that until the adoption order goes through, she has parental responsibility and is allowed to post his picture but as soon as AO goes through then the legal team can insist all the photos are removed. I don't know how we manage as his photo appears on other family members' Facebook accounts as well!Good luck with it all.

Ippy. Surely the BM doesn't have perental responsibility the LA does until the adoption order.

doubletrouble - Birth parents share parental responsibility with the LA, until they are officially adopted.I do think the whole photo owning thing is very confusing though, and I'm not sure anyone really knows the law about it! Photo's we sent to dd's bf ended up on FB. We know because we were told they were there in the contact letters - but the profile is private so I couldn't check for sure. When I asked SS about it, I was told there was nothing they could do. They likewise couldn't see the profile, and when they approached the bf, they were told the only photos there were those taken when dd was still a LAC - therefore the bf's property and they are allowed to post them.I couldn't report it to FB, because I couldn't link to the pics... We just stopped sending pictures to the bf, to be safe.