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Hi. My daughter was allegedly fine at infant school. She seemed to have lots of friends too. But actually things were not what they seemed. By the time she left primary she had very fraught relationships with the other girls and didn't get invited anywhere. Anyway, hope this isn't the case for your daughter but it can be the case that adopted children find it harder as children split into small friendship groups and the social demands become more sophisticated. My daughter was better in groups and playing youngish games. She wasn't good at the more 1 to 1 stuff later on. She too was way behind and I did get her an ech but the thing is, it's hard if the child doesn't act out and cause the school problems. I got private reports done. Ed psych, speech and language and ot. My daughter turned out to have huge pro with receptive language and we didn't know. I suggest that you ask for her to be seen by the speech and language therapist. You could ask them to bring in the ed psych but they wont usually do this if you are not on the ehc pathway. So you might need to do this yourself. Good luck.

My son sounds similar to your daughter in that he is fine socially and emotionally, and is well behaved, but he struggles a lot academically and is very behind. He is in year 2 but is probably about 2 years behind and I expect that gap may widen the older he gets. The first step was for him to seen by the LEA specialist teaching service. They made recommendations- for us it was things like Sensory circuits, beam, clever fingers, a dyslexia literacy programme (such as NESSY) , numicom for maths. If there’s still no significant improvement they may suggest other interventions, like 1:1 support. School wasn’t particularly keen on giving 1:1 support as it costs them a lot, so I had my son privately assessed by an EP (school refused to call in the lea one as again it costs them money) which highlighted his level of need. School then felt more compelled to give him 1:1 support and on the back of this applied for high needs funding. He now gets this funding and gets 1:1 support most mornings. The high needs funding needs to be reapplied for every year, so I’m pushing school to apply for an EHCP as I don’t see his learning issues going away and an EHCP lasts you until 25. But school are dragging their feet as it’s a lot of work for the senco and for the school there’s little to gain as they already have the high needs funding. I’m thinking of applying as a parent unless they get a move on soon as I’ve been waiting for over 6 months now... My son also has speech delays and school referred him for a nhs speech and language assessment. The assessment did show issues but the NHS therapist was unwilling to recommend regular therapy , so we pay for this privately. This has made an enormous difference and his language has improved significantly- it’s almost age appropriate now. The other thing we did was to take him to see a community paediatrician to rule out any developmental difficulties. School can refer or your GP can. School did think maybe he had ADD as his focus was so poor. But the paediatrician ruled this out and said that the reason he finds it so hard to focus is because he finds the learning so challenging. And indeed in the last 6 months or so his concentration has I proved a lot and school too now say it is much less of an issue. There are learning difficulties in his birth family so for him I suspect that this is his primary and probably only need. I have never worked with virtual schools- in my area they are incredibly busy and focus a lot more on fostered children. But my post adoption social worker has helped a little and did come to one meeting with the school. She tried to push them to use his pupil premium to get an EP assessment, but they weren’t keen, so as I said in the end we did it privately Hope that helps xx

My son sounds similar to your daughter in that he is fine socially and emotionally, and is well behaved, but he struggles a lot academically and is very behind. He is in year 2 but is probably about 2 years behind and I expect that gap may widen the older he gets. The first step was for him to seen by the LEA specialist teaching service. They made recommendations- for us it was things like Sensory circuits, beam, clever fingers, a dyslexia literacy programme (such as NESSY) , numicom for maths. If there’s still no significant improvement they may suggest other interventions, like 1:1 support. School wasn’t particularly keen on giving 1:1 support as it costs them a lot, so I had my son privately assessed by an EP (school refused to call in the lea one as again it costs them money) which highlighted his level of need. School then felt more compelled to give him 1:1 support and on the back of this applied for high needs funding. He now gets this funding and gets 1:1 support most mornings. The high needs funding needs to be reapplied for every year, so I’m pushing school to apply for an EHCP as I don’t see his learning issues going away and an EHCP lasts you until 25. But school are dragging their feet as it’s a lot of work for the senco and for the school there’s little to gain as they already have the high needs funding. I’m thinking of applying as a parent unless they get a move on soon as I’ve been waiting for over 6 months now... My son also has speech delays and school referred him for a nhs speech and language assessment. The assessment did show issues but the NHS therapist was unwilling to recommend regular therapy , so we pay for this privately. This has made an enormous difference and his language has improved significantly- it’s almost age appropriate now. The other thing we did was to take him to see a community paediatrician to rule out any developmental difficulties. School can refer or your GP can. School did think maybe he had ADD as his focus was so poor. But the paediatrician ruled this out and said that the reason he finds it so hard to focus is because he finds the learning so challenging. And indeed in the last 6 months or so his concentration has I proved a lot and school too now say it is much less of an issue. There are learning difficulties in his birth family so for him I suspect that this is his primary and probably only need. I have never worked with virtual schools- in my area they are incredibly busy and focus a lot more on fostered children. But my post adoption social worker has helped a little and did come to one meeting with the school. She tried to push them to use his pupil premium to get an EP assessment, but they weren’t keen, so as I said in the end we did it privately Hope that helps xx

Our AS has different difficulties at school (behaviour) Virtual school have attended meetings at school and have also provide training to the staff that work with AS. If you look at the IPSEA website there is a template letter that can be used to apply for ECHP

I’m interested in the replies you get to your post Momma as you’ve described our situation too. Our son has good behaviour and social interactions. He’s in Year 2 and achieving at reception level. School seems supportive but my gut reaction is that there’s more that they can be doing. I don’t know if this is your experience also, but in our son’s school the fact Year 2 has SATS also seems to be relevant. Support is being given to children who, with an achievable amount of support, can achieve their SATS this year. Our son doesn’t fall into this category. We’ve really started to see the widening gap between him and other kids in the class. We are considering private assessments so reading replies to your thread is really helpful.

Hi sparkle motion My son is in year two and working at reception levels. As mentioned above, after a lot of pushing, he now receives high needs funding and gets 1:1 every morning. Personally I think you need to push for extra support. I have a friend whose son left the same school in year 6, working at year 1 levels. He received very little additional support during primary school. He was a “good” boy, just sat there passively and so didn’t cause massive issues for school- he failed his sats, but it’s likely he would have failed anyway even with support. It’s a disgrace really that they didn’t help him more, but I expect his mum has a level of learning difficulties herself and she trusted the school to do the right thing, which they didn’t. He is now at secondary school and sadly it’s all falling apart for him / hejust can’t access the curriculum as he does t have basic reading or writing skills....im not saying that all schools are like this , but some are, and need some nudging. Good luck xx

Hi sparkle motion My son is in year two and working at reception levels. As mentioned above, after a lot of pushing, he now receives high needs funding and gets 1:1 every morning. Personally I think you need to push for extra support. I have a friend whose son left the same school in year 6, working at year 1 levels. He received very little additional support during primary school. He was a “good” boy, just sat there passively and so didn’t cause massive issues for school- he failed his sats, but it’s likely he would have failed anyway even with support. It’s a disgrace really that they didn’t help him more, but I expect his mum has a level of learning difficulties herself and she trusted the school to do the right thing, which they didn’t. He is now at secondary school and sadly it’s all falling apart for him / hejust can’t access the curriculum as he does t have basic reading or writing skills....im not saying that all schools are like this , but some are, and need some nudging. Good luck xx