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Its actually probably the best thing for them all - she may be sad now, but longer term she will have a much better chance of healing without her siblings. Siblings who have grown up together in an abusive environment tend to have a trauma bond (google it) and will re-traumatise each other. I know that is the opposite of what many would think and counter to what society says about keeping siblings together. If SW have separated them it will be for good reason. I suspect they have letter box contact for now - and when they are 18 they will be able to reconnect. Occasionally siblings have some face to face contact say once a year, but it will depend on the circumstances.

It must be so hard for you to watch, but I suspect there's nothing you can really do, except keep being there for her as her aunt - and don't underestimate how important that can be. I don't know how old she is, but she may be clamming up just because of her age and with any luck she'll come out of the other side of that. Or maybe for now, she is just incredibly sad or angry about her situation and doesn't want to talk about it. You can be supportive without addressing her situation - showing her love and a maybe a bit of a good time every now and then will go a long way. For your own peace of mind you can ask your brother, out of interest, how things are with the half siblings - and I don't think that needs to be an awkward conversation - especially if you just empathise, no matter what he says. Or maybe he wants to talk about it and no-one is asking? if you broach the subject prepared for any kind of answer and to talk further or not, you really are just doing the best you can at being an amazing aunt/sister. xx

It's not clear from IndeedyR's post whether these half siblings ever lived together, or if the niece was ever subject to neglect etc. I'm on the flip side of a similar situation in that my adopted child has a half sibling who at the time of the adoption was living with their other parent and I have no reason to suppose that isn't still the case. All I know about them is a name. It's not clear from the information I have whether they ever met whereas I gather from the post that these siblings had some contact even if they didn't live together, but I do sometimes think about the half sibling and how they might feel about the situation. I've not yet worked out how/when I will broach the subject with my child. It's one of those situations that highlights how much loss there is in adoption, and how the children really are the innocent victims in all of this. Haven gives good advice though - building your relationship with your niece/brother will mean they can open up to you about this as and when they are ready to.

Thank you for all your help. It's good to know a bit more of the facts about how adoption works and I hadn't thought about re-traumatisation. I guess it is all about making the best of a bad situation. I'll try and do some fun stuff with her. RocketJ - yes they used to live together for a while and I hope things go well with you :)