Bumblebee3434
October 6, 2020 22:39
hello
This is my first post, me and oh have been talking and researching for a while now about adoption and there is a child in my daughters class that has been in foster care for a couple of years her younger sibling has been adopted and she will remain in foster care unless she is adopted. We feel we could provide an amazing life for her and the family she deserves. We are not nieve i thinking it would be easy esp with our own bd but today our daughter mentioned us adopting a child like X to give them a good home. Me and oh already decided 100% that it is something we were going to start around a week or so ago so her mentioning it seems like fate.
Now my question do you think we would be able to adopt this child (obviously if we meet all the checks needs and wants of a adopted child) is this even a possibility because we have some connection already with them and our daughter also has the connection so i think it would be easier for a child to feel comfortable and happy if they already know to a degree us? Or is this just complete nonsense?
TIA
Donatella
October 7, 2020 08:30
Hi. A lovely idea in theory but in practice I suspect fraught with difficulties. This child will have a back story that you’re currently unaware of and it may well be that the care plan isn’t adoption for many reasons.
Having a pre-existing relationship with your daughter as a friend will, I imagine, make it very tricky to transfer that relationship into siblings - particularly siblings of the same age. And it means little anonymity for that child.
Why has only the younger been adopted? Why were they taken into care? If they were originally together, why were they separated. Social workers generally hate to separate sibling groups.
If you want to adopt, then do look into it but sws will be looking for a good age gap between your birth child and any adopted child. Who knows in the current climate how long the process will take - maybe they have prospective adopters for the child or maybe they feel adoption isn’t right. Maybe she has strong links to her birth family which will mean ongoing contact?
Good luck with your plans
Bumblebee3434
October 7, 2020 09:02
Thank you both for your replies.
We were always considering adoption of a child not necessarily this child but the relationship this child has with my dd over the past 4 years is amazing believe me they are like sisters except they have never had a crossed word. I think maybe i should approach the idea with the adoption company when they get back to me.
Also this child has 4 siblings i know of they have all been separated in fc and the 1 adopted....i am not nosey this is all what i have pieced together from dd.
I understand it maybe harder or trickier but if there is a slim chance of it happening i will try my best. Me and oh have always wanted a big family but fertility issues have held us back so there has always been room in a family for another person or two (but we only have 1 spare room so 1 it is)
We are good stable loving family and believe we have the patience and experience to help a child be a part of pur family.