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I'm a bit confused. It don't miss like you're saying now your sister has moved out you think your parents should adopt or foster. Surely this is their choice not yours? Or are you saying you want to adopt or foster while living with your parents? Either way this won't work and you really need to read up on the issues around loss and trauma that children who can't live with their birth families have. It's not like parenting children who've had good prenatal care and secure parenting from birth. Believe me I'm 12 years in and I know Suze

If I understand you right, you want your parents to foster/adopt? I think this has to be a decision for your parents and not you. When they were at home, my (adopted) daughters often wanted me to foster, but I said no - that was my choice. Fostering or adoption is a huge commitment that is likely to have life changing consequences - it is completely different to parenting birth children. I do wonder why you are so keen for them to do this? What are you hoping they will get out of it? What are you hoping you will get out of it? If you are so keen, why not get your own place and enquire about it for yourself?

Hi there. I think it is lovely that you want to give a child a happy, stable home, but your post left me with lots of questions. First off - how old are you? I ask because you say you are living at home. Are you saying you want to foster/adopt, or that you want your parents to do it? If it's you that wants to adopt, usually, an adoption agency will want prospective parents to have had lots of life experience, and generally that comes with age. Children who need adopted usually come with a range of issues and rightly, adoption agencies feel that people with life experience are better at understanding and coping with these. They will also want to know why you can't or won't have children by birth and that you have dealt with any of the issues this throws up. They will want you to have your own home and your own income and lots of experience with children. If you are thinking your parents should be adopting or fostering, perhaps it would be useful to look at this from their side. Bringing up children is hugely rewarding, but it is also incredibly, incredibly hard work, physically and emotionally. Most parents eventually begin to look forward to having their own time again, and I imagine that's where your parents are. Adopting is even more tiring and more intensive than bringing up birth children, because of everything the children have faced or are facing in their birth home. They will definitely have emotional or even behavioural issues that can't always be fixed just with love. It's not the same as parenting biological children in any way. This is why there is a huge amount of training adoptive parents need to do, and why not just anyone can adopt. You are asking your parents to do a very big thing at a point where they deserve to put themselves first, having put both of you first for such a long time. But what I would say to you, is that if you are looking to make a real difference to a child's life there are many ways you can do that - volunteering springs to mind - and if in years to come, you go on to adopt, it will stand you in very good stead. I also wonder if you are maybe looking to fill the space that your sister is leaving? You sound like a very caring person and that is a wonderful thing, but maybe at this point you should see what you can do out in the world, rather than keeping your wishes at home. Good luck, Haven