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Thinking the unthinkable: the ‘d’ word.

Furcifer March 13, 2023 21:04

Okay, so it’s very tumbleweed on these boards these days but I thought I would take a punt on reaching out to my adopter peers in the hope of some good advice. After 15 years, I am inches away from concluding that my adoptive placement (with my eldest adoptive child) has comprehensively broken down. Please, talk to me if you have trodden this path before me.

Safia March 13, 2023 21:38

Yes it’s so quiet these days - at one time it was non stop! It must be so hard for people asking for advice or wanting to share - often at the end of their tether - and having to wait days for a reply. I haven’t ever quite reached that point but I can certainly imagine doing so! I can’t remember how old your kids are or any details of your circumstances unfortunately but didn’t want to leave you without a reply. Have you tried the potato group -

there’s lots of people there who’ve been through similar and can offer practical advice. My only thoughts would be to find counselling for yourself to help you think it through and to have some support for your feelings. Also to access post adoption support to find out what is there for your child - though presumably you’ve tried all that already?

You could also try the archives - I’m sure there’s lots there - the only thing is you couldn’t have a conversation (sadly)

Edited 14/03/2023
kat75 April 11, 2023 18:56

I can't offer any advice but if you are in England then

might be of help. Adoption is a lonely road at the best of times, hope you find support soon.


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