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Hi and welcome

Firstly: edit your post to take out your real names as this is a public forum and confidentiality will become very important to you in the adoption process.

To answer your question, there are some organisations which co-ordinate social meets for adopters/prospective adopters, which can be good for building network. New Family Social do this (for LGBT+ adopters)

More broadly, it might be useful to think of support network in different ways and break it down. Even draw a Venn diagram or concentric circles.

Your emotional support: who you phone to offload or meet up with at the weekend for a chat may be further away. Your practical support: who can help when you can't get to the shops or with being the emergency school contact may not be the same person.

FWIW: parenting children with additional needs and traumatic starts in life can really challenge your idea of support network - some people just don't get it/aren't supportive. Some other families with "typical" children melt away.

I have learned that the other adults who are supportive are varied and not always adoption-experienced but almost always trauma-informed, empathetic, have experience with children with disabilities....people with rigid ideas - whether about behaviour or their own high standards in whatever (diet, educational attainment) - can be disastrous.

Sorry, I'm not being very helpful about where you'll find "your people" as it very much depends on your interests and values (some people here find community in church, others in sports clubs).

Another thing you could do is look at potential support which might include places you might meet other children / families - local activities, drop-ins, libraries, parks, groups for children the age you are looking at - baby gym etc. Also look at adult support groups where you might potentially get support / make friends such as adoption support groups locally or parenting support groups. Then look at what sort of emergency provision there may be - and charities that may be able to help in an emergency and of course schools, playgroups, childminders etc. Some of this will be actual potential support and some places where you will meet others, make friends and find your own support. Also not all support has to be physically there - phone / internet groups and contacts and ways you can keep in touch with your own friends outside of adoption to keep you sane!

Hi!

We are also in Scotland currently waiting on a match, so can give you some of our feedback of the process so far and what we found. Firstly for us it has taken so much longer than we ever anticipated. We had our first meeting with our SW in November 2019!. Bear in mind though Covid did play a part in the delays we faced. Although in Scotland at the moment I know there are far more adopter than children awaiting adoption with many local authorities including ours have put a hold on any new adoption applications. So prepare yourselves for what could be a long wait.

The assessment process for us took around 6 months, dig deep and give really honest answers. We found it quite therapeutic but if your a private person be prepared for some questions you may find intrusive.

The biggest surprise for us overall was the matching process, I don't think we really covered this much during the assessment. We were so consumed with getting approved that we saw the matching process as the really exciting part of the process. From our experience though the matching process has been the toughest part. We were so naive to begin with, the first expression of interest we put in we thought this is it and had so much hoped pinned on this being a match. Fast forward a year and we are now 60 expressions of interest in and are still waiting. Although, everyone's journey will be different and by the time you reach the matching process the amount of children waiting on adoption could have changed so please don't be put off by this but my advise would be to mentally prepare to hear a lot of no's before you get your yes.

Your support network is important and will play a part in your assessment, but the advise the previous comments have given is really good.

Hi, Adoption UK has meet ups for prospective adopters (open to all) and for LGBTQ adopters - take a look here for more info: https://www.adoptionuk.org/members-community-groups

It's a really supportive, diverse community for all adopters, wherever they are on the journey. We'd love to meet you, Ross & Will!