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Anybody out there?

DP52000 November 12, 2020 18:49

Hi, I'm a little disappointed that there is only the one post on the LGBT section of this forum. Is there a reason it's so quiet here? are LGBTQIA+ adopters just fully assimilated into the forum and don't feel the need for a separate area or is there another forum or site used by adopters who are part of the community?

Voyager November 12, 2020 19:17

We have been feeling the same for a few months now, since joining the forum when we were granted access to Link Maker. We are also LGBT and also think it is a bit rubbish that there is only one post on that section. It would be great to look at things from the LGBTQIA+ perspective as it isn't just a case of one size fits all, so to speak. LGBTQIA+ people (sometimes) encounter different things and have (some) different experiences on their adoption journey. Thanks so much for raising this!! Would be good to start up discussion about people's experiences, where they are in their fostering or adoption journeys, how they feel they've been treated by the system (good or bad), what issues (if any) they've come across, how the children respond to having or potentially having LGBTQIA+ parent(s) etc. etc.

Edited 12/11/20
TL-M01 November 12, 2020 19:51

Hi, we are also members of New Family Social

Voyager November 12, 2020 22:41

We are also members of New Family Social, but would also be great to have discussion on this platform too

Serrakunda27 November 12, 2020 23:01

Its quiet because the whole site is quiet.

A few of us ‘old hands’ have hung around and do what we can.

If you want to have a thriving board, you need to start your conversations and not wait for others. If you have something to say or want to discuss then get stuck in.

Voyager November 13, 2020 09:07

Totally agree!

Donatella November 13, 2020 09:30

I’m one of those old hands! My three are now 19, 16 and 15. I dip in occasionally but my opinions, suggestions, experience etc haven’t always been welcomed ?? and the word negative has been used!

In reality, my 19 year old is in his second year in university, my 16 year old achieved amazing gcse grades and is now doing his As. He’s dx adhd and ASD but there are many positives in those diagnoses. He’s a very talented artist.

And my 15 year old, who’s also dx ASD and has some learning difficulties, is also thriving in her unit.

The whole board seems to be very quiet - there have been so many changes and I suspect have just given up and found other means of support. I know I have and most of the oldies who were around when my three were small, are no longer here.

Indie900 November 13, 2020 21:36

I'm a new member though I had read through some posts a while ago. I also noticed that it was quiet on here. I might be wrong, but I think that perhaps things will start picking up with a bit of time. I'm in my early 20s so I'm one of the eldest of Gen Z (the current young people) and I've noticed the topic of adoption coming up with more people from my generation. I think it means a forum like this will gain traction but I think for the time being most people in my age group are out partying and not thinking about children yet ?

DP52000 November 13, 2020 22:16

Thanks for the feedback.

We’ll have to have a look at New Family Social. I’ve had a look at a few other forums but not found anywhere that felt comfortable yet.

We’ve found a lot of face to face support had been scaled back due to the pandemic and will have to look a little closer at online.

Safia November 14, 2020 11:56

There are people out there I’m sure - there certainly used to be - as said above if you post something yourself you will get replies - though it may take a while as the boards aren’t what they used to be. Another thing you could do is search the old archives - there should be a lot there. Don’t forget people often tend to post on the more general boards about issues rather the LGBT - so you wouldn’t necessarily know someone’s sexuality or relationship status - as should of course be the case

Edited 14/11/20
DigitalAUK November 16, 2020 16:17

Hi All,

Please do post about topics that you want to discuss or find out more about. We know it is quieter on these boards than it used to be and we are trying to reinvigorate the boards with your help, but know this takes time and do know that many people left when changes were made last year.

Those that have stuck with us - thank you! Your advice and support to other adopters is so important. Those that are new and want to talk about new topics, please just post away!

We do have our first LGBTQ+ virtual meet up this week, which will be a great place to connect with others (details can be found here -

We are also open to hearing from you as to how we can do more on the forum to assist conversations. PLease feel free to message me here or via [email protected]

Best wishes and I hope you are all keeping well and safe,


Sophia and Shelbi December 26, 2020 23:51

Hi everyone, I have just joined and would love to find people to chat with 😊 My parter and I are just starting the adoption process so very new to it all.

Simon January 7, 2021 18:12

I can definitely recommend Matthew and Emma’s Adoption UK LGBTQ+ virtual monthly virtual meet-up. Last night’s meet-up really cheered me up in these strange and often bleak Covid-19 times. In fact, we had quite a giggle.

The next virtual meet-up is in February. Please get in touch with our fantastic hosts Matthew and Emma to join (via this link:

We have a wonderful mix of "adoptive parents to be", new adoptive parents and adoptive parents with younger children. It would lovely to have some more LGBTQ+ adoptive parents of teenagers. Currently it’s just Matthew and I, “crying” into a virtual glasses of gin as parents of teenagers (I jest – I think!) It would be great to have along some more parents of teenagers to share their experiences – it all helps.

See you there. The more the merrier

Simon x

sheridan-wayman January 14, 2021 16:47

Hi Simon,

My husband and I are looking to start the process of adoption, currently looking at local agencies. We were hoping to join your next virtual meet-up but cant seem to do so as we haven't yet decided on the agency or been approved.
Would there be another way for us to get in contact for advice?

Many thanks,

Tyler & Phil

Simon January 14, 2021 19:44

Hi Tyler and Hi Phil


Wonderful news. I will drop a message right now to Matthew and Emma. Watch this space.

Good luck on your adoptive parent journey and I hope to meet you both "virtually" very soon at a future Adoption UK LGBTQ+ monthly meet-up.

Take care



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